we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
