Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
