I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
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