ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
Randomize
