I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
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