I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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