if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
