We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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