NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
try to milk me bitch
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