Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
