arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
