kristin has been a bad kristin
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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