it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
