I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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