actually, I'm a sock model
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
