Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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