the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I'm really busy with my period
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