He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
