yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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