If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
