She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
