I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Randomize
