Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
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