Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize