Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
