I'm sorry my penis didn't work
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
I was hammered helping a pregnant woman at the gas station name her unborn child. We had to try everything with two different last names because she was waiting on the results of her paternity test.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
