I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
