Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Randomize
