just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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