Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
