Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
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