I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
