so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Randomize
