id be glad to
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Sure, fine. Daughter just told me she is not a virgin anymore. I am gonna start drinking now
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
