My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
It's blow job season.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
