Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
