I look better un-naked...
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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