So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
