Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
Randomize
