so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
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