that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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