As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Hello Officers/Paramedics, judging by last night, my friend is dead. The money in his pockets is mine, he owed me. Please send me directions to whichever morgue/strip club for pick up.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
