Do you still have your period?
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
