I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Slut skills are useful in every country.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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