i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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