I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
A+ Viking dick
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
