Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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