Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
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