I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
