would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize